Revolution Soul Train

Despite the title of this episode there was no Don Cornelius only a steam locomotive that may or may not be sabotaged with an explosive log.  It would be difficult not to find this amusing.

Don Cornelius

After a long period spent aimlessly wandering through the woods our heroes arrive in Noblesville, Indiana to find Charlie Matheson's hunky brother about to be shipped to Philadelphia, which is important for an undisclosed reason?  This show has the annoying habit of either telling you nothing or telling you everything without that natural balance. 

Much of the show is devoted to the backstory of Monroe Militia Colonel Tom Neville.  Before the power went out he was a cowardly insurance claims adjuster, much like General Bethlehem in the Postman, who repaired copiers.  He is now a martial figure with little compassion for weakness or impediments in his way.  He has an extremely hot wife, played by Kim Raver, and his son, Nate, is the spy who has been chasing Charlie, father and son have similar tastes in women.  We meet more rebels and the secret of the 12 pendants that will bring the power back.  Now we must, ugh waste more time with whining dull characters, and find these devices.

Kim Raver, her real name.

The train arrives in Philadelphia with little real threat of derailment.  No one thinks to rip up the tracks or place a tree over the tracks before the train arrives?  These idiots could not win a guerrilla war against the Soviet Union let alone a set of melodramatic monochrome dressed grave speaking neofascist militiamen.

The guy in the shades is the drummer.  These guys are the Beatles of the Alaskan militias.  Guess who is the lead singer?

Revolution Plague Dogs

You may wonder why I have been spending so much of my time focused on this soon to be forgotten and erased from NBC silly drama that the actors and producers have been coached to call science-fact. 

If you can recall the marketing campaign for the Denzel Washington film, Deja Vu, they refused to say that it was a time-travel movie because it was possible that the past could be viewed from the present for a brief window.  A window that allowed Denzel, and only Denzel, to travel back in time and stop Swiss Jesus (Jim Caviezel) from bombing a New Orleans ferry boat while saying "Ha....HAW," "my man," and "excuse me?!."  All based on fact apparently.

DENZEL



Anyways in this week's episode, Plague Dogs, there were many easily escapable death traps, maudlin flash-backs, a tornado and actual dogs.  There was not much to report from this episode other than Miles Matheson was a "murderer" and the mildly hot older English woman, Maggie was killed.  Things are slowing down and the Joseph Campbell circles are becoming unwound with story lines that seem to allude constantly and offer random events rather than direction.  This is not on purpose to befit some nihilistic existentialism, more likely its poor writing and remote production work via email/skype from Jon Favreau and JJ Abrams.

Jon Favreau believing that he is the only person with a smartphone.



Revolution is like the Branson version of the Walking Dead.  USA Today version of the Postman.  

becoming a loser and retroactive salmonella recall

When you begin writing about derivative tame network dramas as if you are engaged in passionate literary warfare against various ideologies, such as the NBC show REVOLUTION, you are a loser living in a basement apartment at the dog racetrack.  Living and dying over the minor details and indistinct characters in non sequiter flashbacks is not healthy.

On this week's episode, "No Quarter,"  Miles and his niece, with a groups of rebels trying to restore the United States (like the Postman), find themselves trapped by the militia and decide to tunnel out.  We learn that Miles used to command the militia where he killed people (like the Postman was a member of the Holnist militia).  The characters are aghast, its not like he raped or pillaged which seems more likely in this alternate future than this tame outrage.  Meanwhile the brother Matheson remains prisoner to the militia and the English woman, Maggie, and Aaron, google exec find a computer.  The mysteries are beginning to unravel at a pace that puts one to sleep rather than spark interest.

As a loser of the highest order it is my humble duty to waste more time and complain bitterly about this show's inability to overcome its silly nature that makes the Adam West Batman show seem like an progenitor of Downton Abbey or Game of Thrones.  Sword fights are lame unless there is the threat of death or decent choreography.  Again this brings me to the more important issue at hand, JJ Abrams is lazy.  There it is its only libel if its not true.

JJ Abrams



In the middle of writing this post I received a robocall message from Kirtland (COSTCO) on my answering machine.  The smoked salmon may have salmonella.  What more fitting bacteria could there be than that?  The irony escaped them.  Its raw, obviously it may contain bacteria and cause health problems.  I have been eating their smoked salmon every morning for over a year and now realize I may have been food poisoned every day for over a year.  I appreciated the phone call.

  

Revolution or the JJ Abrams version of the Postman

Apologies if you are expecting the cast list for Steel Man, the Joseph Stalin sitcom.  Its difficult getting actors to sign with a fictional tv show that exists entirely in my head for no money.

The new NBC drama REVOLUTION is a story set 15 years into the future following a total electrical blackout rendering the world in an apparent survivalist mode as marauding militia roam the country enforcing their law for a mysterious warlord named Munro, although spelled differently multiple times between two episodes.  Continuity is not priority one here, this is a JJ Abrams production after all and its about speed not content. The show is definitely a network program and often restrained in its silly action sequences that resemble Errol Flynn in Robin Hood. 

Giancarlo Esposito

The main character, Katniss, I mean Charlotte Matheson is a teenage huntress living in a hamlet with her family.  When the Militia lead by Giancarlo Esposito kills her father and kidnaps her brother Charlotte and her coterie that includes her fathers English? girlfriend and an overweight former google exec, the comic relief,  head to Chicago to find her Uncle, Miles Matheson, a former Marine.  Charlotte is the moral compass and heroine on her journey from the ordinary.  There are some emerging storylines and dimensions to the characters that give the show some mystery, such as why the power failed and what is on those pendant flash drives?  This is a solid start and has great tv potential to survive its first season.

Charlotte Matheson and coterie

When I hear people talk about how original or new this is, especially the producers, network, and the actors, I have an epileptic fit because its grossly untrue and I don't have much going on in my life.  Its like when the film 3 Kings was released and the studio denied that it was a ripoff of Kelley's Heroes, the entertainment reporters didn't understand what plagiarism entails.  Or passing off an adapted screenplay as original, it becomes meta problems.  This show was heavily "influenced" by the 1997 epic Kevin Costner flop, the POSTMAN.  If you don't remember the basic plot of the Postman, and the David Brin novel it was based upon, it is thus:   the story is set 15 years into the future following a total electrical blackout rendering the world in an apparent survivalist mode as marauding militia roam the country enforcing the law of 8 for a mysterious warlord named Nathan Holn, here under the command of General Bethlehem (Will Patton).  The Holnists bear brands of the number 8 (infinity) on their arms as the Munro Militia all bear the letter M.  Both burn American flags and forcibly conscript soldiers, as well as repeating lines from the movie and tv show verbatim.

General Bethlehem





Because I have thoughts about this show that are not groveling praise does not mean I will not watch the show.  Despite these meaningless details REVOLUTION has a heroine with a crossbow in skin tight pants, subtle HUNGER GAMES nod production team, who looks a lot better than Kevin Costner.